The Transition to Motherhood

I just read a birth announcement that had me a bit nostalgic! Now that Jackson is 1.5, he is the best thing ever! Even when he drives me crazy, I still think he is cutest, most lovable little creature in this entire world. I love all the little words he says and all of his screeches. His little smile melts my heart and his little face is so squishy and I could snuggle up with him forever.

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But he wasn’t always like that! I know a lot of you were around for my early days with a baby and even though I loved Jackson to bits and pieces, even back then, I didn’t want to snuggle forever! I wanted to put him down and get on with my life. YOLO!

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I warned Kassie before she had a baby that the transition to motherhood was the most challenging thing I’ve ever done in my life. Her other best friend had PPD and she never knew it at the time! So she appreciated all of the input, but motherhood was a pretty smooth transition for her. It took a few weeks, but she has really taken on this Mom thing without all of the doubt that I had!

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Another fellow blog mom had a baby and I thought her transition appeared to be going really smoothly, but then she came out and admitted she had PPD and that she cried all the time! I had no idea! It’s the New Mom facade, where I think people are embarrassed or ashamed to admit that their lives just kind of suck with their new little human around.

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I remember when Jackson would wake up, I just had no idea what to do with him to keep him awake for 40 minutes. Change him, feed him, and then….???? He couldn’t DO anything. Walk around outside for a few minutes. Maybe do some tummy time. The time would drag on until I could just put him back down for a nap and get back to my schoolwork or TV shows (or pumping- let’s be real, I was spending about 6 hours a day pumping back then). The days just seemed to take forever and I couldn’t wait for bedtime at 7pm- at least once he started sleeping all night. The monotony of waking up to feed him and pump and then give him solid foods… Life literally revolved around feeding a child for months.

I actually remember the first time I left the house alone after having a baby! I went to Bookanalia (our book club) at Jessica’s house and I sat in traffic for so long to get there. I cried on the way because I missed my freedom and my old life and wished I could just leave whenever I wanted to! I was even so happy to be sitting in traffic and listening to music without a baby! And then when I got to Jessica’s, I immediately had to pump or I risked decreasing my milk supply.

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Running errands with a baby was such a production too! Especially when I was exclusively pumping! I had to take my pump, bottles, coolers with ice packs, diapers, bibs, clothes- the list goes on! And don’t get my started on pumping… Giving up pumping (which I hung onto until 11 months and ended up donating 3,500oz to the cutest adopted baby!) and getting back to working out (I had a stress fracture so spent a lot of my postpartum time in a boot) was KEY in returning to feeling like myself!

I thought maybe we made a mistake and we would have been better off with kids. What if I always just kind of wished we didn’t have him? I knew my love for him would grow, but I had no idea what that even meant back then.

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There are still plenty of times where I think about how easy life would be with no kids! How much more I could be working and how I could travel more and we could buy a boat and I wouldn’t feel guilty at all for wanting to work full time!

But now I look forward to getting up with Jackson. He eats his own breakfast while I get my breakfast together. He feeds himself dinner while I eat next to him. He holds my hand (*melts*) when we walk into the store. He keeps me company while he rides in the cart. I get to play outside with him and watch him learn and grow! Before I dropped him off at daycare this morning, I sat with him in my lap and we watched 30 minutes of the Minions. He pointed to the TV and laughed and danced and snuggled me. Even though I can’t wait to explore a new country next week (FRANCE HERE WE COME!!!!!) and nothing fills my soul like leaving the country, I think my sweet, slow, snuggly mornings with my gingery toddler are getting up there with getting off the plane in a new country.

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Sorry about the poor photo quality- these are downloaded and resized from FB! Jon is bringing my external hard drive this weekend with all of the original images.

Interning, Jobs, and the Future

Happy Thursday! No weekend updates this past weekend because life is busy and I don’t even remember my weekend anymore. Jon went to Myrtle Beach this past weekend so I was solo-Mommin’ as usual, and then I worked Monday, interned Tuesday, and worked Wednesday.

I applied for two full times jobs at my hospital! I haven’t talked much about my internship or my jobs or what I’m thinking for my future because I haven’t been set on my goals. I went into this thinking I’d be a per diem ER nurse still once I finish school, until Jackson and our next kid make it to full time (FREE) school.

But I totally love my internship. I can really see myself doing this. Unfortunately, I’m not super comfortable in a preceptee role, so I feel a bit awkward at times. Well, maybe that’s not the right way to put it. I don’t feel like my personality shines when I’m a preceptee because I feel like I’m being watched and I don’t know if I’m supposed to have much input. I also am attending meetings with the directors of units who have been leaders for so long, so I don’t think I even comprehend everything they are talking about quite yet (and a lot of this stuff is ongoing, so I came in without any background and am piecing it all together now).

I have really realized that I do want to do this and I don’t want to wait forever! I also love my hospital and I think the ER is doing some awesome new things that I like where the department has gone in the last few years. I can’t really fathom leaving and going somewhere else, when that hospital feels like my home. I want to move forward where I know the leadership team and where I can have mentors and where I have support.

So I applied for two jobs. I don’t know that I’ll even be considered for either, honestly. I’m completely fine with that, but I know if I don’t get a promotion here, that I’ll have to go back to Charleston in May and find a job there, and I’ll finally have to quit my job here (after 8 years). At least I’ll know I applied and if I don’t qualify, I totally get it. I would require a lot of support because I don’t have experience, and I don’t know if our unit can take that on right now. I also don’t know I’ve impressed my preceptor (/director of my unit) enough either.

But overall, the internship is going great. The days fly by. I love it. I am so glad to be working in the ER again. One of the paramedics took my patient to the floor the other day and she told me yesterday that he just raved about me the entire way up. I really missed connecting with my patients while I was out of work. Which brings me to my next point-

It’s hard for me to imagine NOT being at the bedside anymore. I can say hands down that I get burnt out if I work full time hours at the bedside. I don’t want to work 36 hours a week as an ER nurse. But 20 hours a week? Yes please! As a manager, I wouldn’t be providing patients with care and I’ll miss that relationship building. So if neither of these jobs at my hospital work out, I need to figure out where I can work in Charleston that will provide me with what I need to move forward in my field, but that I will still love doing.

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We are definitely in a good routine around here. I’m off today and tomorrow (I decided not to intern twice this week since France is coming up soon and I have a major paper to finish, plus a smaller paper, and then a ton of discussions to work on). We get out of the house by 7:15 every day and we just have a good system going.

I miss Jackson though! Man, do I miss him! Being a working mom now is so different than being a working mom with a newborn. I hated having a newborn, so I loved leaving to go to work! And back then, I really only picked up 9-3 shifts since I had to be able to pick Jackson up from daycare. My mom helps now, so I work 9-7 and I intern from about 8:30-4ish usually. So Jackson and I get home around 5:30 and he’s in bed by 6:30. He’s so much fun now that I wish we had more time!

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Just a fun throwback to when he was a wee boy!

I got sent home from work early yesterday (we were slow) at 5pm! I had planned on working out after work and considered going before heading home, but I knew I wouldn’t see Jackson much if I did that. So I went home and we snuggled in the chair in his bedroom for so long before I put him to bed.

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How can you not love this face? He found my old BCGs from basic training in my cabinet and has been wearing them all the time.

Jackson’s been sick for awhile now but I’ve been giving him Motrin and chugging him along to daycare! I can’t miss work for a snotty nose and a fussy boy. And he’s totally fine once he’s there. But he had a massive poop explosion in his crib this morning. He cried through breakfast. Then he got a bloody nose. His nose is turning black and blue now so he must have gotten in good. But we ended up snuggling on the couch for about 30 minutes, just watching Moana. When we got ready to leave, I really wished we could have just gone to Target together and then went to the park. He’s just getting so big and I love this age so much that I want to soak it in more! And Jackson’s all about Daddy on the weekends and seriously wants nothing to do with me, so I only get his attention during the week (and Grandma gets half of that attention- Jackson LOVES his Grandma!!), so I just wish we had more days together like we did in Charleston!

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Weekend/Week Recap

Will I ever get my Weekend Recaps done on time?! Ugh. Actually, I do occasionally, but this week I’m slacking and was about to put this off again!

FRIDAY

I worked until 7pm on Friday (new norm- always working until 7pm on Fridays!)! I had totally planned on going to the gym after work, but nope. Instead, I ate a sandwich from Newks and waited for Jon to get to me!

Jon got in around 8:30 and we literally went to bed almost right after he got here. I was so tired from three full days of working and Mommin’.

SATURDAY

As usual, I got up and went to LA Fitness on Saturday morning. I really wish I could get to CrossFit on Saturday mornings, but the class starts at 9am and that’s just too late for me. I’m typically in a hurry on Saturday mornings. The gym was followed by Whole Foods and then a super quick shower before heading out the door.

Jon and I took Jackson to Gina’s house for a brunch. We were set to get there around noon, so we left at 11 so Jackson could get in a nap in the car. He was sound asleep so we took a super long way to Gina’s and arrived at 12:20ish.

I made scrambled eggs and then Kassie, Billy, and Ellie (their daughter) got there. Laura was there when we got there. We all chatted and laughed about how our hangout sessions have changed so much from partying downtown to having brunch with our babies.

Jon and I got home around 4:30 and got Jackson some dinner. I did some schoolwork while Jon and Jackson got in some daddy/son time. My oldest sister, Tonie, got to our house in the evening and we all hung out for a little while before putting Jackson to bed.

After bedtime, Jon and I ended up working on planning France. We have two more AirBnBs to go (in Dijon and Paris) but are all set other than that! The trip is going to be crazy busy!

Bedtime on Saturday was early, as always. Like, the whole house was in bed by ten.

SUNDAY

Another gym morning! Tonie wanted to go work out too, so I got some company! Except she just wanted to run, so I ended up doing legs alone. We got home from the gym and it was another mad dash to get ready!

Jon and I left around 11:30 again so that Jackson could nap on the way to the Braves game! Jon and I have been going to the Home Openers for years. We actually took Jackson to the game last year since it was the last Home Opener at Turner Field but it was a disaster! We decided to leave him home for the Home Opener this year, but we knew we had to take him to at least one game this year!

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Baseball games with one year olds are not easy! Jackson loved it and thought the lights and sounds were great, but he also wouldn’t sit still. He wanted to climb up and down the stairs nonstop and he was just all over the place! We were at the stadium for less than two hours before we decided to give up! There was an astroturf field out front with fountains that we hung out in for awhile. Jackson loved splashing his feet in the water.

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I was laughing here because Jackson is super over-protective of Jon and pushed me away when Jon had him between us. When Jon moved him to the outside, I put my hand on Jon’s chest and Jackson pushed my hand off of Jon and said, “Nooo!”

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Anyway, the game was fun! We got home around five and my mom was making dinner, so we hung out until it was ready. Jon had a business dinner to go to, so he left while I did bedtime and hung out with the family.

MONDAY

I was babysitting for Ellie on Monday, so after Jackson’s drop off at daycare, I headed over to Kassie’s house. I hung out with Ellie for five hours and we got in our snuggles while I reminded myself why I love toddlers (Ellie is three months old and she was so good, but I just love the interactive toddler phase!).

Once I was relieved of babysitting duties, I picked up Tonie and we headed out to the gym! We worked out together and it was my first gym workout with a person in so long! It was fun, but I prefer to superset everything and get everything done super fast. I rarely rest during a workout unless I’m doing heavier lifts. I’m sore today though, so at least I got a good workout in!

Tonie and I picked Jackson up from daycare. He was good for about a half hour and then lost his shit! I put him to bed at 6:30 and the kid fell right to sleep! I hung out with Tonie and filed my fingernails and my toenails and finally took a shower and folded diapers and made lunches (the life!).

I had a team call for the health and wellness business at 9pm last night! I haven’t been hopping on the team calls lately because I’ve just been so busy, but it was nice to get on. It totally motivated me and made me want to get back into the business, but then reality hit this morning at 5:40 when I remembered I don’t have time right now!

I was so excited to get in bed!

TUESDAY

Intern day! Becky (my preceptor) forgot about me this morning and was in meetings all morning, so I sat in her office and did homework from 8:30-11:30. It was glorious! I did two discussions and worked on my clinical log. I was needing to get those done so I can focus completely on my paper tomorrow since it’s due Sunday and I can’t ever get work done on the weekends!

I was interning all day, so I got home at 5:30. My mom had picked up Jackson already so I hung out with my cute boy for an hour and we put him to bed at 6:40. His voice is hoarse and he sounds so cute! It melts me!

I put our lunches together and then hopped on to the computer to type up my clinical log and then I started writing this. About to go to bed (it’s 8:30- I’m so lame!) because I am exhausted tonight!

I think Tonie and I are going to go to CrossFit together in the morning! I haven’t gone in forever! And then I’ll be doing my paper all day since it’s due on Sunday and it’s my last day to work without Jackson around (interning Thursday, working Friday, and nobody can do work on weekends with a baby around!).

 

Where I’m At With Health Coaching

I haven’t talked much about my health and wellness coaching lately because, well, I haven’t been doing it much. While I did absolutely love it and hope to really pick it back up in the future, I just don’t have time right now. School, work, interning, and my family is taking up all of my time. I haven’t been seeking out clients and haven’t really made myself too noticeable on social media lately.

I do have a handful of clients though and I love working with them! Like, really love working with them. I have definitely connected very well with one of my clients and I get so excited seeing her progress! I check in with her almost daily (although, our challenge group was going on so a lot of my check ins were in the challenge group, rather than via text or FB message).

I follow a lot of other fitness coaches too on Instagram and Facebook and I’ve realized what type of coach I don’t want to be.

Do you ever read the captions that go something like, “I really didn’t feel like working out today, but I still pushed play! 30 minutes later and I’m done! Push yourself! This is what changes are made of.” Great message, right? But come on. Rest days are GREAT for you. And it’s about balance. I wake up and don’t want to work out and you know what? I don’t. I take the day off until I feel ready.

My client texted me that she hadn’t worked out all weekend but was sticking to her meal plan, but she was in a funk and just felt off. Can you imagine if she had been looking at my Instagram every day and saw me posting statuses about how you have to push yourself and that’s how you make progress and blah blah blah? When you’re already feeling like you’re failing, does it ever help to see how accomplished other people are?

Instead, I told her that she has done great so far and I was proud of what an awesome job she has done. Everybody hits a wall sometimes and there is absolutely no need to get down on yourself about it. I am coaching because I want people to be healthy for the rest of their lives. Not for a 21 day challenge. Not for a few months.

I want their mindset to change. I want them to see that a few rest days or weeks or gaining a few pounds here and there or eating an entire cake is really nothing to stress. I want them to know that if they fall of the wagon, they can just get back on it. It’s not about pushing play every day. It’s not about choosing the broccoli over the cake every day. It’s about knowing your worth, making an effort to eat a wide variety of healthy foods, and to move your body most of the time.

I went through an entire year after having Jackson where I barely worked out and I ate terribly. I still classified myself as a healthy person overall. I knew it was temporary. I understand that my clients have jobs, babies, husbands, LIVES. My most recent client told me that she does great for a little while with working out but gets depressed when she misses a day. Why?! I miss days all of the time! The difference between me and them is that I have spent years working on this mindset. I’ve never had an (emotionally) unhealthy relationship with the gym, food, or my weight, but I also haven’t valued health in the same way that I do now. I accept off days and they don’t affect me (except for injuries- those are just frustrating). I just keep on keeping on and I am 100% confident that barring any major medical issues, I will be active and eat well until the day that I die.

My client who texted me about her funk was very appreciative that I was realistic with her. She told me she needed to hear my response and that made me feel good. Because I can help somebody. I remember telling Jon how little I make from one client who only buys workout videos, but they are my client for a year. I wondered if I’d get in over my head by only selling the videos. But I reminded myself that to me, this isn’t about the money. I did this because I want to connect with people and that is what I’m doing. I absolutely love the connections I’ve made and becoming a coach has been completely worth it to me.

So, I don’t ever want to be the coach that tries to sell a false sense of motivation. I’m not motivated all the time. I do still work out when I don’t want to. Trust me, I do it a ton. I also genuinely love working out most days though. But I’m not going to act like I push play all the time or make excuses about why I needed to rest. I may tell a reason why I skipped a gym session, but I won’t have an ounce of remorse for it. I don’t live my life to work out. I work out so that I can live my life to the fullest.

 

Weekend Recap

Does anybody notice a theme here? I seem to only been updating on Mondays! I think about sitting down to blog a few times a week but then… life happens!

Tuesday was an internship day last week, Wednesday was a short work day, and Thursday was an internship day. So I’ll start with Thursday since nothing happened the other two days!

THURSDAY

Around 11am, I left our sister hospital and went to my hospital (main campus). As soon as I got there, daycare called to say Jackson was running a fever. I left right away to go pick him up. I gave him Motrin as soon as we got home and he improved a ton!

When my mom got home from work, we went to run some errands. I returned pants to Kohl’s and got Jackson some pants and long sleeves (I only have summer clothes in his size since Charleston is so hot and it was so cool on Thursday morning!). We went to Target to grab a few things and then to Costco to stock up on some food.

As soon as we got home, I headed downtown since my friend, Jessie, was in Atlanta for the evening from South Korea. I haven’t seen her in so long but it was so nice to see her! She knows Jon from elementary school and is married to Jon’s best friend from childhood and we love them! Her husband is working out in South Korea for three years and they just got there. So, very nice to see her! And it was a beautiful night. We sat outside and had dinner and then walked around Piedmont Park. It’s been so long since I’ve really been downtown to hang out, especially now that Kassie moved out of that area.

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That kale salad was incredibly good!

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FRIDAY

Jon was here on Friday! He came in town on Thursday night since Charleston was evacuating for the storm and he figured he might as well come be with us! Jon actually ended up covering some cases in the Atlanta territory (at the hospital he also worked at as an x-ray tech before taking this job), so it was just me and my bub!

I took Jackson to the pediatrician in the morning for his 18 month check up. Poor boy hated it! He was so upset about being there and he got so nervous when anybody walked in the room!

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The blurry bottom of the photo is because my screen protector is broken, haha. Need to buy a new one.

I stopped to get coffee on my way home since I knew I’d have some time to sit and relax for a bit while Jackson napped. Jackson took a good nap when we got home and I worked on a paper for school. I basically spent all afternoon working on a paper since Jon got home around the same time. I ran out to the gym in the afternoon and then spent the evening just hanging out with Jon.

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At 9pm, Jackson woke up screaming his head off. It continued until 2am. SO frustrating. We had been giving him Motrin and Tylenol all day and it shouldn’t have worn off by then, but we gave more (we alternated it). I think he just got overly tired and would not calm down. We finally gave him Benadryl at 1am and put him in the car and he calmed down as soon as we got in the car. Finally, at 2am, he was sound asleep so Jon and I got to go to bed too!

SATURDAY

I was on call from 7a-11a and thankfully, I did not get called in! I couldn’t have handled it after our Friday night! I planned on working out in the morning if I didn’t get called in, but no way. We all slept until 8am and then just hung out at home until I left at 10am to go to work. I worked 11a-7p and came home and hung out since I wanted to get in bed early.

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SUNDAY

Much of the same as Saturday! I didn’t get called in at 7am, so I ran to the grocery store before work and then got ready and headed out to work 11a-7p. I went Laura’s once I got off work to check on her cats. I was there for awhile feeding them and changing out their water and scooping the litter box. I stopped by Newk’s for a sandwich and then got home and relaxed with Jon for a little while.

MONDAY

Today! I got to go to the gym first thing in the morning! Woohoo! My morning gym sessions are what I miss most about Charleston! I actually tried to go to CrossFit at 7:45, but it was closed today (the owners are stranded in some other state post-competition because flights aren’t coming into Atlanta, and I guess nobody else ran the classes). Instead, I headed down to LA Fitness. It was so empty in there! I wasn’t really feeling a workout at all this morning, but once I got started, I got into it.

I came home and joined my boys for some breakfast. We had to take quick showers after and head back to the pediatrician for a shot for Jackson since we postponed it on Friday because of his fever.

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In the waiting room.

During my bub’s nap time, Jon and I started planning France! I’m super excited about our trip together but wish we had another two or three days at least! We’re going Alsace, the Alps, Burgundy, and Paris. It’ll be a jam packed trip but I love that, so it’s fine!

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I sat down now to do schoolwork (don’t tell Jon, haha). The storm is just getting here and the wind is picking up, so I assume we’ll be spending our afternoon at home. I’m supposed to intern tomorrow, so we’ll see how the weather is and if daycare is open or not! My poor boy is super fussy from his shot and probably from not eating all weekend so it’s a rough afternoon around here…

 

 

Weekend Recap

Well, BUSY week last week. I’ve neglected the blog a little bit because I was so busy solo-Mommin’ last week and trying to stay on top of school. I did make it to the doctor for my stomach but have an appointment with GI later this month, if I go. My issues aren’t nearly as bad as last weekend but I’m still not back to normal at all. It’s really frustrating since I’m nauseous almost constantly and nothing sits right.

Jackson and I got into a little groove with work, daycare pick ups, dinner, and homework last week. It wasn’t so bad and I’m staying ahead of schoolwork, but it’ll be nice to have company this week too.

FRIDAY

I had to work on Friday until 3. I stopped by the gym to sign back up for a membership and then got home right after Jon and Jackson. Jon left early on Friday, so he was here to get Jackson from daycare. It was so nice to have them home when I got home!

After Jackson went to bed, Jon and I went to a little outdoor shops area. We decided to grab some dinner since we were both hungry. I ended up accidentally ordering fried chicken (I thought it was grilled), but it was so good! The mac n’ cheese was so good too! Unfortunately, with my stomach issues, I totally paid for it.

SATURDAY

We got up on Saturday and hung out with my parents for a bit. I headed out to the gym for a little while while Jon ran some errands with Jackson. I got home in time to shower and grab a bite to eat before Jon and I put Jackson down for a nap and headed out the door! (Note: We can have a life again because we have live-in babysitters again!)

Jon and I went to the outlets in Woodstock to exchange a shirt that I had bought, except this outlet mall didn’t have the same shirts. I grabbed a few more basics for my internship (I can wear them with jeans- just tanks and cardigans) and then we stopped at Chipotle (did not agree with my stomach) before heading downtown for the Gator game.

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Gotta get that Ghirardelli hot chocolate when you can!

We met up with Andrew and his girlfriend, Liz, at Fado in Buckhead. It was so packed! I enjoyed people watching, but man, did I feel old. All these styles are coming back in (bodysuits, leotards, Adidas shelltop shoes, overalls, high waisted shorts) and I am so not a fan of the look. Thankfully, I’m 31 now and don’t need to look cool, so I can stick to my Target v-necks. The game was so incredibly long and I don’t like football (hence the reason I was checking out the current trends on all the young girls).

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I was mad at Jon for throwing a fit when I asked him for a picture, so this was me pouting.
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He should have been happier because this picture turned out great!

It finally ended close to 7 and Jon and I had to go check on Laura’s cats. We did that and then went to grab ice cream. It was bedtime by the time we got home from doing all of that, so we basically went straight to bed when we got in.

SUNDAY

I headed to the gym again on Sunday morning. It’s so strange being in a gym with so many machines again! My gym here is probably 5 times the size of my Charleston gym and I was just so used to the simplicity of my Charleston gym. But I decided to try out some back machines and I definitely did get in a good back workout.

I came home and did some schoolwork while Jon hung out with Jackson. Jon had plans in the afternoon so it was just me and my bub!

Once Jackson was up from his nap, my mom and I took him to the park so he could run around. It’s so nice in Atlanta right now- such a welcomed change from Charleston! We had a good time at the park. We even attempted to go on a walk with Jackson, but toddler walks are impossible. We didn’t make it far!

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Watching the skateboarders with Grandma.

Jon got home before Jackson’s bedtime on Sunday, so we hung out around the house for a bit. I was in my pajamas and ready for bed, but Jon wanted ice cream again. I wasn’t feeling well so I knew I should have skipped the ice cream, but I can’t turn it down when we go out! Big mistake! I felt so horrible afterwards. Jon fell asleep as soon as we got home and I was up for an hour feeling like I wanted to die.

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Eating ice cream! Not at a club. Obviously. I’d do my hair for the club.

MONDAY

Labor Day! Also the day Jon had to leave again! Sad face. I skipped the gym in the morning because I wanted to maximize my time with Jon. We had breakfast with Jackson and then decided to go to a coffee shop to do some trip planning.

Everything was closed, so we got stuck at Panera. But we booked our October trip to FRANCE! Our plan had been Eastern Europe (roadtrip from Prague to Tatra Mountains to Budapest) but we slacked and missed the flights. Way too many Skymiles (it was 60,000 last time I looked) so we decided to go to France. I’ve been wanting to go anyway but was set on a fall trip in Eastern Europe since we loved Poland so much, but oh well! Next time! Our plan is to fly into Paris and roadtrip through Alsace and Burgundy and then go into the Alps. We may try to make it out to Normandy, but not sure if we’ll have time. And obviously, cap the trip with a few days in Paris.

We got home and Jon and I headed out almost immediately to go check on Laura’s cats again. We got home right before Jackson’s nap ended, so we hopped in bed in hopes of quick afternoon cat naps. Except my cat snuggled up on Jon and snored the whole time, so I never fell asleep.

Jon left immediately once Jackson was up, so Jackson and I had the evening to ourselves. I managed to get one discussion posting out of the way (took almost three hours with a toddler here). We cooked and had dinner and played outside and had baths.

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Trying to type my discussion with this kid.

My oldest sister, Tonie, came into town last night around 7pm. We hung out on the porch for awhile. She leaves today around three today. I have to intern, so I won’t get to see her much, but she’ll be back in a few days to stay longer.

Another week of interning and work, but I’m going to try and get some workouts in this week. At home and at the gym. I’ve been slacking on home workouts, but I guess with my stomach being such a problem, I’m just way less motivated. Even my workouts at the gym have been much easier than I’m used to.

Weekend Recap

I know it’s Tuesday, but life is back to it’s usual craziness! I already talked about the actual move on Friday, so here goes the rest of the weekend! I took like, three pictures all weekend so this long post is not going to be very pleasing to look at. Oops!

SATURDAY

Jon was in town on Saturday morning, so we got up early and I ran to Whole Foods while he did breakfast with Jackson. As soon as I got home, we headed up to the outlets to get more basic shirts for my internship. I found a few plain tank tops and a few new sweaters. I think I have enough to make it through a year. I’m only interning two days a week, at most, so a few sweaters and tanks and I’m all set.

I started cooking on Saturday afternoon and Jon was going to head out to run errands for me, but had car troubles. Put a bit of a damper on our afternoon. We were able to run to the park with Jackson for a bit in the afternoon, but we had to be back during the day so he could see what was going on with his truck.

I did a quick Piyo workout video, but really, I ended up mostly stretching more than following along. My body was still so sore.

Jon and I caught up on Bachelor in Paradise on Saturday night and I was in bed by 10pm.

SUNDAY

I worked 7a-11a on Sunday and then I was free! I was on call until 3 but didn’t get called in, thankfully. I ran to Whole Foods again because I forgot cottage cheese on Saturday morning (also still forgot hummus).

I got home and Jon was getting ready to leave. I was so sad! I knew I’d be sad about the distance but it was much harder than I thought. I’m okay being away from him, but with a kid, it’s totally different. I just feel bad that Jackson doesn’t get time with his daddy and that they’ll only have Saturday during the day and Sunday mornings together for so long. It was definitely a hard goodbye, even though Jon will be back this Friday. I think the initial goodbye was just the hardest since we aren’t into the swing of things yet.

Gina came over after Jon left. We hung out at home and got some stuff done and then went to Panera for lunch. I can’t say that I enjoy eating out with Jackson, but that’s the phase of life we’re in!

I’ve been having some issues with my stomach lately. Every time I eat, I get nauseous and gassy and have stomach pain. My appetite has been really decreased and I’m just not feeling right at all. It started Wednesday and was really bad Thursday morning when I went to meet up with Lisa and Nora. After Panera, I felt so awful. Ugh.

I had to prepare lunches for daycare and work and get Jackson’s diapers ready for daycare. I was trying to figure out what needed to be done the next morning. I was in bed by 10pm again!

MONDAY

Back to the grind! Up at 5:40 to get myself and Jackson ready. We got him to his first day of daycare and he did great at drop off. Definitely a little unsure, but toys distracted him.

I felt so awful on my way to the hospital. I had to stop at Target for a notebook and noticed I had blood in my stool and was just feeling awful. I can still function- it’s not like I just need to lay down, but it is not a pleasant feeling.

My first day of my internship was good. I’m actually pretty excited about it. It was busy but I liked attending the meetings and seeing what was happening. The time flew by and it was 4pm before I knew it.

I picked up Jackson from daycare. He did pretty well during the day there. He just wanted Mama snuggles though when I got him and it was so sweet. And he was in such a good mood when we got home! We didn’t get home until after five, so much later than I’m used to.

We ate dinner and cleaned up dishes and did laundry and the usual adult things. I got Jackson ready for bed and put him down a little early since I’m waking him up a bit earlier now.

I spent almost two hours writing a discussion post and working on my clinical log and then watched Bachelor in Paradise and hit that sack around 11pm.

TUESDAY

We had a slower morning today since it’s my off day this week. I dropped Jackson off a little while ago and it didn’t go as smoothly. He was eating breakfast with his friends when I left and they were all digging in and Jackson was just kind of looking at his food and seemed unsure of his yogurt/banana combo. He started crying when I kissed him goodbye and clung to me. I know I’ve spent tons of days away from him, but it still breaks my heart when he cries when I leave. I wish I could stay and snuggle him all day!

I’m heading out to the doctor this morning about my stomach. I don’t feel as terrible this morning, but still nauseous and lacking an appetite. This just seems way different than my usual nausea/not feeling well illnesses. Not sure what’s going on. I want to get this resolved and get back to working out. I don’t want to work out when it’s hard to eat food though, because I have to work tomorrow and Friday and intern on Thursday, so I can’t be depleting myself of all of my energy!

Then I’ll spend all day working on assignments! Probably won’t have tons of time since I doubt I’ll get home until later with this appointment, but at least I’ll get a little uninterrupted time!